JEREMIAS: Day two. Did you get any sleep?

DIANE: I slept like a baby. I guess it might have something to do with those two Valiums.

JEREMIAS: I thought maybe you could tell everybody a little bit about yourself, like where you grew up.

DIANE: I was raised in a great town just outside of St. Louis. It’s on the Missouri River. Summers were hot and very humid, but there was always the high school, where we girls could always go to get stoned or drunk. My Dad worked for a factory which made "adult" toys, but was transferred when I was in the 5th grade to where we live now.

JEREMIAS: We know you're a virgin. Did you ever have any close calls?

DIANE: I love Mike very much, but once I came real close to making sweet love to the chef in my high school cafeteria.

JEREMIAS: How is your relationship with your parents? I know a lot of people will think this is some kind of parental rebellion.

DIANE: Although I've respected my parents on the surface, underneath I always felt quite differently. Now that I'm an adult, I can see that my father has basically been running away from responsibility all his life. Just ask any of my five half-sisters! So now, although I'm real glad that he had me, he seems like a worthless piece of garbage to me most of the time.

JEREMIAS: What do you think of today’s media?

DIANE: I don't watch much TV except things like Days of our Lives, America's Funniest Home Videos, and pornos that I watch with my little sister. I like shows where there's a lot of real life drama, like in the daytime soaps. I'm on-line a lot, too, looking for old men to tease in chat rooms. Once, we were talking about an Olympic swimmer who was a fag. Even though the swimmer said he was gay, this one woman was sure that he got AIDS from being anally raped in prison, and the AIDS made him gay. Where do these people get these ideas?

JEREMIAS: How did you meet Mike and what made you fall in love with him?

DIANE: Mike and I have been best friends since 6th grade. This group of older boys had gotten me drunk and stoned, and all I knew was I woke up naked in Mike's garage. He was so sweet to take care of me after that. He's still sweet now - he’s very romantic. He likes the idea of showing the whole world how much we love each other.

JEREMIAS: No second thoughts?

DIANE: It will be hard telling our parents, especially since Mike's Dad is a Catholic priest, and only used to the idea of anal sex with boys on the receiving end, but we feel passionate about this and are ready for whatever happens.